What Makes Sex Sacred?

What makes anything in our lives sacred? Those of us who belong to a faith practice believe we know what the word means. Actually, the word itself has little or nothing to do with a system of faith or belief.

The english word sacred is derived from the Latin word "sacer" which is translated as "untouchable." The antonym or opposite is "casual." Being devoted exclusively to a single purpose is one definition of sacred. However, for my purpose in writing and teaching about sexuality I prefer the definition of sacred as "being highly valued, deserving of awe and reverence." That which is sacred has the power to transform one's life.

We must practice anything we are just learning to do if we want to do it well. To bring the sacred into our living, one must practice sacred awareness. Seeing the sacred in everything is just such a practice of consciousness. It takes time and space in one's life to become aware. Sacred awareness requires a quiet mind, an opportunity for remembrance and self-forgetfulness. Along with such an awareness, we might also consider that shifting our use of the word "sacred" from an adjective or descriptor to using the word as an adverb allows the word to become a description of doing or being. This brings the practice of sacred awareness into present time all of the time. It allows us to live in harmony in our mental, spiritual and physical lives.

Sacred sexuality means there is nothing profane, common or casual about any sexual encounter. Being with our sexual partner (the one who loves, respects and honors us) is worthy of dedication -- of time, focus, passion, emotion and mutual respect. This dedication must be unassailable and reverent in order to become sacred as well.

I suggest that we stop looking at our lives and the people and things in our lives as common and everyday. Choose to find the time to see the uncommon in everything. See and experience the act of making love with awe and reverence.